Counseling Couples

I've had the intense privilege of helping to coach a few couples this past week. Among many thoughts and Scriptural principles talked about, spiritual warfare is a prominent factor.

While couples, people are subject to the spirits and schemes of the enemy, we must ALL be accountable for our sins and sinful behavior. Leading people to repent of their sins first and then renouncing the work of evil they've allowed is critical. There is a spiritual attack on our marriages because it is called a covenant - a covenant of promise that reflects the covenant we have as children of God, through Jesus!

2 Corinthians 10:3 For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. 4 The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. 5 We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. 6 And we will be ready to punish every act of disobedience, once your obedience is complete.

Passing the Trust Test

I couldn't pass this Maxwell lesson up! Relationships will deepen in a Christ-like manner as we live out these values!

Among leaders who lack insight, abuse abounds, but for one who hates corruption, the future is bright. Proverbs 28:16 (The Message)

People today are desperate for leaders, but they want to be influenced by someone they can trust, a person of good character. If you want to become someone who can positively influence other people:

1. Model consistency of character. Solid trust can only develop when people can trust you all the time

2. Employ honest communication. To be trustworthy, you have to be like a good musical composition: your words and music must match.

3. Value transparency. If you're honest with people and admit your weaknesses, they appreciate your honesty. And they are able to relate to you better.

4. Exemplify humility. People won't trust you if they see that you are driven by ego, jealousy, or the belief that you are better than they are.

5. Demonstrate your support of others. Nothing develops or displays your character better than your desire to put others first.

6. Fulfill your promises. One of the fastest ways to break trust with others is in failing to fulfill your commitments.

Becoming a Person of Influence

John Maxwell

Lessons of Leadership

An excerpt from Professor Ben Shin, Talbot School of Theology: Lessons of Leadership

So how do you actually “pay close attention to yourself and to your teaching”?
I would recommend four basic practices that have been helpful for my own busy life with ministry.

First, I would carve out some personal time to reflect, think, and just examine my heart. This is just a discipline of silence and solitude that will allow opportunities to reflect and examine one’s heart.

Second, I would dialogue with honest and close people in my life and ask them to evaluate me. I would then compare my perception of myself with what they say. My spouse knows me the best and can certainly give an honest assessment of how I am doing. It would be important to listen to her input!

Next, I would be in the process of journaling and recording my thoughts over a period of a year. Then, I would read over my journal logs to see if I have progressed or regressed. This would potentially tell me if I was doing well or if I’m cynical. Checking to see if the journal logs are any indication of my heart and seeing if they offer any clues to the condition of my soul.

Finally, I would spend extended times in prayer asking the Holy Spirit to expose any shortcomings or undeveloped parts of my character that needs growth. This is not an easy process to do but definitely a necessary one if a pastor or leader is to have success not only in the eyes of the church but more importantly in view of God’s high calling and standards.

Displaying His Heart

Good Eye - Bad Eye

You will enjoy this post by Dr. Gary Manning, who taught at Pacific Rim Christian College, now an Associate Professor of the New Testament at Talbot School of Theology.

http://thegoodbookblog.com/2011/feb/04/good-eye-bad-eye/

More Great Biblical Instruction at: http://eutychusnerd.blogspot.com/

Are people drawn to you?

I love our Evangelism Team!

Humility of a Child. Heart of a Shepherd.

Scripture

Matthew 18:15 “If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over.

Observation

Who’s the greatest in the Kingdom?

...will he not leave the 99 - and look for the one who wandered off?

The greatest in the Kingdom may not be found behind the pulpit, riding in a limousine chauffeured to the Fortune Five Hundred award gala or influencing their community or city in civil or moral leadership.

The greatest in God’s Kingdom will be found following Matthews account of Jesus’ instruction in chapter 18. The disciple, whether leader in the community or church, volunteer, housewife, child, elder, business entrepreneur or pastor - will study the instruction of Jesus to human-kind on the relevant, Kingdom of heaven pursuit of greatness and relationships in life.

Becoming the greatest in the Kingdom, will require humility, boldness and courage. The fight to overcome pride, anger, resentment and unforgiveness. How? Showing others their fault or sin. I don’t’ mean this to say that we should be ”fault-finders“ or the contrast, ”overly sensitive, insecure“ Christians who get hurt easily by others, only to find themselves blame shifting on those who hurt or sin against them. But we must hear and heed the Lord through Matt. 18’s instructions.

And...before we can even answer this question: ”Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother who sins against me?“, I think we should pay attention and obey Matt. 18:15.

Application

I find myself as a spiritual leader, with fair regularity, guiding people to follow Matt. 18:15. People come to me to ”ground offense or hurt“ confessing their anger, bitterness, unforgiveness to me about someone who offended or sinned against them. I don’t’ mind counseling people towards Biblical resolution, but when people have a passive attitude towards obeying Jesus’ guidelines in Matthew 18, I get weary.

I want to live differently today, being affirmed by His Spirit... ”Rod, you are my spokesperson, doing My will as a pastor.“ To live differently is to receive this encouragement from God, not grow weary in doing well to fulfill Jesus instruction, equipping others to walk by Matthew 18.

Prayer

I confess Jesus, I get tired of weak, passive, ignorant and hard hearted people who want to vent, but are calloused to ”suck up their FEELINGS and hurts.“ I just want to say ”lick your wounds“ and get over it! BUT WOE am I!! If You or others treated me this way when I am hurt, I would be doomed! Forgive me, strengthen me, fill me with Your love, once again...today...for You, people. May I be a follower and example of Your character and life - to others around me...especially my family!!!!